Romans 7:13-25 is one of the most curious portions of the New Testament. In it, Paul speaks openly of two laws at work within himself, one of them drawing him closer to the things of God, and the other tripping him up along the way. The things he wants to do he finds he does not do them. The things he does not want to do, those are the things he finds himself doing.
It may be the clearest case of inner tension expressed in Scripture. Paul, standing in for the Christian, expresses the conflict that he finds in himself between what is left of the sin nature and his sanctification. Part of him is still attracted to sin, but a growing part of him wants more of Christ’s life.
And so it is for the Christian who strives to know God more. We want him and his life, but we find that “evil lies close at hand” (vs 21). This inner tension can become a frustration. In fact, I would say it needs to be a frustration for us.
We do not like inner conflict. We do not like questions without quick answers or tension without resolution. Consequently, we are tempted to try and rid ourselves of the nagging feeling we are not honoring God in our lives. We may even get to the point where we have denied the tension for so long, we have effectively turned sin into our own moral standard. We have, in effect, taken the place of God.
Paul’s tension is better, however. It is better that we recognize what is going on within ourselves so we can learn to pinpoint where sin is still at work and learn how to surrender that part of our selves to God and his purifying work. If I am conflicted, it means God can be at work within me turning me into the image of his Son, Jesus Christ (Romans 8:29).
Left to my own devices, the tension may not be that deep. I may have eliminated it altogether. Maybe I have simply given in and the Enemy has won. The inner conflict means you are, at least on some level, pointed in the direction of God. Some part of you wants his life instead of the old life of sin.
There are two things in favor of the work of God when we feel this inner conflict. First, God created us with his moral law built into us. Romans chapter 1 began the book with the fact that God instilled his “invisible qualities” within the human soul and that we are responsible for knowing them (1:20-21). In this way, God is always at work when his design causes us to feel the tension between sin and sanctification. It is good that God has done this, and it is good when we come to realize it.
Secondly, the Holy Spirit convicts us of sin in order that we might be brought closer to Christ. Conviction does not always feel good, and sometimes it means we need enough humility to accept it, but it is always the good work of God within us.
Finally, this inner tension is intended to lead us straight into the arms of Christ and the power of the Holy Spirit. This is the story of chapter 8, and the incredible news that there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ. We can’t find that if we ignore the conflict or try and turn our sin into our standard. When we are open to the work of God within us, we will find our soul’s true home in our Savior.
This spoke to me where I am almost each day!